Other Stuff
Nation Promises to Discuss Gun Control and Mental Healthcare Just as Soon as Tragedies Stop
The tragic shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut has sparked national outrage and cries for reform, eventually. The massacre – which left 26 dead, including 20 children – has spurred the American public and its representatives alike to agree to hold a frank and open debate on gun control, the state of [...]
Opponents Who Call Tax Plan “Impossible” Have Underestimated Power of Prayer, says Ryan
Faced with bipartisan criticism that the Romney/Ryan ticket has promised a substantial amount of economic reform without detailing how it will be accomplished or paid for, Paul Ryan took to the stage earlier today, delivering a lengthy speech admonishing critics for “not trusting in the Lord, our God, to provide. “ “I’ve had a [...]
Zeppos Forces Dining Workers To Craft Devotional Statue in His Image
Seeking to ensure his eternal glory, Chancellor Zeppos announced Tuesday his plans to have dining works craft a 57 foot tall bronze statue of himself confidently postured and surveying campus on horseback. The statue, titled “Equestrian Zeppos,” will be located in the middle of Alumni Lawn where future generations can admire its craftsmanship and symbolism. [...]
Ron-Paul-Ryan-Seacrest tries to bring spark to struggling Romney campaign
Amid a turbulent presidential bid that most recently featured a leaked video of Mitt Romney making an arguably disparaging comment about voters who pay no income tax and must “take some personal responsibility and care for their lives,” Republican vice-presidential nominee and three-headed mutant Ron-Paul-Ryan-Seacrest has been called on to help refresh the campaign’s image [...]
Right Thing Done for Wrong Reasons
A local woman, who had momentarily lost control of her legs in the middle of a crowded intersection, was heroically saved by Oscar Skaggs on Monday afternoon. Running behind schedule, Skaggs had flagged down a taxi in order to make it to his son’s playoff game. But the taxi, which reeked powerfully of body odor [...]
Don’t forget to come out to the very first Slant meeting of the year!
Hey there everyone, don’t forget that the first Slant meeting of the year will be held this Sunday at 8:30 PM in Sarratt 130. Be there and make sure you bring your funny! http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=103391299766226
The Real Sing-Off
After returning from taking third in the International Championship of Collegiate A Cappella (ICCA) and conquering nearly the entirety of the a cappella world, the Vanderbilt Melodores decided to concoct a new in-house competition to keep themselves awake and interested in their own performance at their most recent concert this past weekend in the Student [...]
Gospel of Mark, Volume VII: 7th Heaven, Better Than the First Six
Welcome to the seventh and final edition of The Gospel According to Mark. In this section, I’ll be answering all of your questions with the wisdom I’ve garnered from over twenty-two whole years on this earth. So, sit back and prepare to fill your brain-hole with my knowledge. Don’t like it? Just remember, no means [...]
How I learned to Football Good, Like a Man Does
As a woman, I’m kept pretty busy. Between doing laundry, cleaning things, and cooking three meals a day for my husband, Frank, sometimes it feels like I’m being pulled in every direction. So it’s no surprise that I’ve never had the time to learn the ins and outs of the complex game of football. It’s [...]
Is Good Writing Really Does Matter That Much?
Writing is about being expression and telling something you think. Passive voice is often thought of by people to be a bad thing. There are times it is not bad but actually good. In fact. It is making me tired of it that people are not in favor of using passive voice. And also “to [...]
