How to be a bad parent: An insider’s guide on how to make your kid a delinquent

Recently, I’ve seen a lot of books out there giving advice to adults on how to be a good parent and how to raise your kids to become good citizens.  I say screw all of that.  Who would you rather your son be – Screech Powers or Tupac Shakur?  Would you rather your son grow [...]

Top 10 things you would never want to hear your girlfriend say…

10. I really miss standing up to pee.
9. Nope, that’s the wrong hole.
8. You know, I really thought Eliot Spitzer would have had more stamina.
7. I don’t really buy into this “one partner” ideal….
6. Awww, look at those kids! I think at least two of them are mine.
5. If we moved to Arkansas, this would [...]

The porno mad-lib

You will need the following:
1.  Place that delivers food
2.  Pizza Topping
3.  Male body part
4.  Female body part
5.  Sound a human makes
6.  Place in house
7.  Household Appliance
8.  Other male body part
9.  Other female body part
My day as a typical (insert place that delivers food) delivery boy changed this morning when I got a phone call to [...]

List of celebrities you never would’ve known served in the military

Dave Thomas (the Wendy’s guy) (US Army)
Bill Cosby (was a medical professional in the Korean War) (Navy, worked in physical therapy)
Drew Carey (US Marines) Pic of Drew from back in the Marines days (http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/6f/Drew_Carey-Marines.jpg)
Ice-T (US Army)
James Earl Jones (voice of Darth Vader) (Army – even went through Ranger school)
Andy Rooney (60 Minutes) (US Army)
George Carlin [...]