10) Throwback jersey nights featuring our Commodores dressed as actual naval commodores – swords and all!
9) Enforce mandatory IQ tests for NCAA athletes
BMEs revive 1920s Coach Dan McGugin from the dead.
7) NCAA institutes rules preventing athletes with excessive legal problems from playing. Wait, they already do that? How do the Vols still have a team?
6) Vandy players can stop opponents with two-hand touch.
5) Widen Field Goal posts by 30 yards
4) Get that Sega Dreamcast controller with the screen on it, so no one can see what plays are being called.
3) Kidnap Lee Corso
2) Insist to officials that “men’s football” is actually “women’s scocer”
1) Find loophole to use Titans’ Chris Johnson’s lost fourth year of eligibility
