With my sophomore year about ¾ of the way through and my editorship wrapping up fairly soon, I have to say I have learnt a lot. I have discovered that buying more underwear when you should really just do laundry is only hurting yourself, Easy Mac doesn’t have the actual word “cheese” in its name for a reason and most importantly, I have learned the fine art of food scavenging.
Last year, my meal plan was a glorious 28 meals a week. I’ll be the first to admit that as a freshman, I lived like a queen. Not only did I feed myself and supplement my upperclassmen friends’ diets off of this plan, but when I went home for the summer I brought a rather large bag of Easy Macs and Izze sodas with me. Foolish in my youth, I donated this food. As Cat Stevens said, I wish that I knew what I know now when I was younger.
This year I am living in McTyeire. This decision has improved my Russian, gotten me really close with my Russian peers and half-starved me. McTyeire’s inflexible meal plan has caused me to take up an interesting life of conservation (always carry Tupperware, you don’t want to eat the second sweet potato now, but you will later), begging (making those favors from last year pay off) and scavenging. It is this last point that has really gotten me through those particularly meal-sparse weeks. Scavenging, or the art of free food, is one of the untapped secrets of this beautiful Acfee-indulgent campus.
Like a vulture to a dead-caribou carcass, a raccoon to a garbage can, or a leech to an artery, I attend a superfluous amount of free food events on campus, talk to alumni over dinner, schmooze to the chancellor over ice cream, or salsa over chips. Student organizations, the Admissions Office, the Office of Housing, the Engineering Departments—all have tons of events geared towards networking, looking fly and feeding me.
It’s funny how life works—two years into college and one year with an inadequate meal plan, and I have learned to scavenge well but not to cook any better. However, one very important lesson that I have learned: not that many people read this far down on my column, and of the few who do, most know me personally. Hey Mom!
