Issue #5 funny ideas

Slant Meeting – Issue #5 Funny Story Ideas (Almost Winter Break Issue)

Reminders:

1. a. Issue comes out on 12-9-09.
2. b. Submit your writing(s) by Sunday at 6pm
3. c. Productions: Monday from 1-11pm and Tuesday from 5-8pm (Sarratt 135)
4. d. Features

i. Front page

ii. Big Stories = 500-800 words

iii. Short Stories = 375-ish words

iv. Top 10 list

v. Around the Loop (ATL)

vi. Interview(s)

vii. Fucked Image

viii. Bastard Confession

ix. Advice Column

x. Center Spread

xi. Throwaways

xii. Others…

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

NEW IDEAS (Compiled on 11-30-09)

1)      Alpha-male relationship guide (Dibs: AUSTIN CAROE)

2)      Guide to InsideVandy.com website (Dibs: BRENDAN ALVIANI)

1. a. Vandy on Twitter

i. Cycles through old posts, but never updates.

1. b. Blogs from Study Abroad kids
2. c. Confusing layout, with all the important stuff hidden like Easter Eggs

3)      Randomly awesome (and deceptive) websites (Dibs: BRENDAN ALVIANI)

1. http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com

i.      Self-explanatory

1. www.HighDEAS.com

i.      The place for “inspiration”

1. www.redtube.com

i.      Sneaky porn site

1. www.LPSG.org

i.      Large Penis Support Group

1. http://www.studentology.net/tuesday/

i.      Is it Tuesday?

1. http://iamawesome.com/

i.      At least someone thinks so.

1. http://dicktowel.com/

i.      Courtesy of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia

1. (more…)

4)      Greek Life actually infects campus with swine flu (Dibs: RYAN CARR)

1. a. Literally getting sick of doing sorority house rounds
2. b. Fumigation becomes necessary
3. c. “free shots,” get yours

5)      MADNESS (Dibs: DAN KING)

1. vs. RAGE

i.      Band

ii.      Tri-Delt’s t-shirt

1. Sparta-kick

i.      Begins a pandemic of asshole-ishness

ii.      Heeled girls get arrested for impaling people

6)      New Moon (Dibs: CAITLIN)

1. Highest grossing midnight movie ever

i.      Take that, Mr. Dark Knight, even with your throat cancer and dead actor

ii.      Team Jacob vs. Team Edward vs. Team Alice

1. Bella actually chooses to leave with Alice in the end

iii.      Relevancy to a real, lunar, new moon

7)      FAKE AD: Stupid Survey Stats

1. 95.361% of students don’t smoke crack and drive

i.      Go Us!

8)      Personal Ad’s

1. New dating website

i.      Slantharmony.com

ii.      Slarmony.com

1. Featured full profiles
2. Classified style blurbs

9)      Obituaries (Dibs: ANDREW LIGON and AUSTIN CAROE)

1. Vandy football’s ego
2. Etc.

10)  Word Clouds (Dibs: JUSTIN BARISICH)

1. Of everything in the issue
2. http://www.wordle.net/

i.      The Hustler’s word frequency

ii.      The Slant’s word frequency

11)  Funny Calls to Action

1. Submit the most ridiculous opinion articles ever to the Hustler to see which one gets printed

12)  ECON 569 (Dibs: ABI)

1. Porn resume
2. Porn-ish / inappropriate crossword puzzle or scavenger hunt
3. Dirty / explicit Madlibs (Dibs: RUDY WU)

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

STILL UNUSED IDEAS

13)  i-Berlin Wall 2.0

1. a. “Shake well, separation is natural.”
2. b. Of Commons and Communists
3. c. Hunger Strike / Extreme Buffet eating contests as acts of protest
4. d. Mini-“care” packages / lofted over the wall with mini-parachutes
5. e. Men with NERF guns guarding it
6. f. Kool-Aid Man reappears
7. g. Berliners appear from behind the glass windows of MRB III as the fake walls come down

i. Berliners are donuts too!

14)  Cover idea:

1. Brady Bunch-esque picture of minorities on campus

i.      Have 3 copies of the same Asian girl because we couldn’t find another one to have different pictures.

15)  iPhone creativity (Dibs: CHARLOTTE)

1. camera-phone pic sent to other time zones in order to get a sober judgment of another person’s legit hotness
2. Updates on you’re the Pub orders

i.      “Sorry, your fries were ganked by a football player again.”

ii.      “Oh, just come back next week and try again.”

1. Phone numbers and contacts games

i.      Dialing wrong numbers (intentionally or unintentionally) and fucking with people

ii.      Receiving calls from people you don’t know and pretending to be what/who they’re for

1. 1. “Yes, this is Domino’s…”

iii.      Taking your friend’s phone and renaming all of their contacts as Sesame Street characters.

1. GPS Assassins app on the iPhone

16)  John Cabot University ad in the Hustler = ad for Vandy Lite! (FAKE AD)

17)  “Bonzai” theory of improving the football team

1. “Break them to make them stronger.”

18)  Unexpected T.V. stars that were once military killers (Dibs: RUDY)

1. Drew Carey
2. Mr. Rogers
3. Ice-T
4. Montel

19)  “Coexist”

1. …in the name of free food
2. Compose a schedule of when and where to get free food

20)  Divinity school publishes their own humor magazine?

21)  Retaliating against all bitch-ass RA’s

1. Booze probie can’t drink pains away anymore
2. Bitchiest RA ever
3. Is a puppy-punter
4. Is a baby rapist
5. …but not really

i.      Talk about the psychology of people only remembering headlines

22)  ATL à Most disappointed(-ing) majors

23)  New ASB Sites

1. Guiding Natty Light
2. ASB = “Average” Spring Break

24)  “Where the Wild Things Are”

1. Hipster list vs. Preppy List

25)  DA-DA Club?

26)  Centerspread Idea 1

1. Horrible movie adaptations of other children’s books

i.      “Sin City” overhaul of various Dr. Seuss stories

ii.      “Get the Fuck Down, Moon” instead of Goodnight, Moon

iii.      The Very Hungry (Bulimic) Caterpillar

27)  Balloon Boy = real-life version of UP!

i.      Not sanctioned by Disney/Pixar

28)  Football game re-cap from a non-footballin’ perspective

29)  Hobo’s, Now on the Card! / Hobo-Cash

30)  FML / Texts from Last Night generator formula

31)  “B.C.” = Before Commons (students)

1. a. Story of how the administration just wants to get rid of all us B.C. students

32)  Interview with the guy who met last year’s Kissam Hobo in the bathroom

33)  Quizno’s Tom Update

1. “Subway Seizure” story

34)  Famous Alumni Interviews

1. Bill Gates
2. Al Gore
3. …

35)  Biological Warfare Against the Indians

1. Via blankets via swine flu
2. Swine Snuggies
3. Indian Retaliation

i.      Tea Embargos / Blockades

ii.      Question the Commodore’s actual maritime credentials

iii.      Lack of oranges = scurvy

36)  Pop Culture

1. Gentle(man) / Sir GaGa
2. “Dude looks like a lady GaGa”

37)  Swine Flu / H1N1

1. (ATL) à “How did the Swine Flu epidemic affect you?”
2. (Possible VTV idea) Disaster movie à 20 hours after exposure, Day 2, Day 3, etc.

38)  The Sophomore Slump / Slums

1. Lobby in Vandy/Barnard??
2. (Top 10) Things the new Freshies can thank the Sophomores for…

39)  Stereotypical College Kid Posters

1. Examples: End of the War Kiss, Audrey Hepburn, James Dean, Belushi with College sweatshirt (replace his head with Zeppos’), The Joker, etc.
2. (What do your posters say about you?)

40)  Sprinklers

1. New Sport – Sprinkler dodging/limbo
2. Feel like James Bond in a stealth movie or Mario dodging fireballs in Bowser’s Castle
3. Wet T-shirt Contest!

41)  Squirrels

1. Squirrel on every page doing a different pose
2. Chip and Dale, the adventuring chipmunks, make a guest appearance

42)  Cougar Column

1. Cougar hunting

Related posts:

1. Water Polo Team Not Horsing Around Due the recent failures of the football team and...
2. Vanderbilt Upgrades Locker Room in Hope of Competitive Edge I wasn’t quite sure which direction to take this or...
3. H1N1 Masks: A Fashion guide Some may argue that vomiting and fashion do not go...
4. Freshmen Bowled Over by Commons Third Floor Decision After much consideration and input on behalf of the student...
5. A Halloween Mad-Lib So I headed out to the party dressed as a...