Editor Musings

What is the easiest part of this paper to prepare beforehand? This column. What is the largest irony in this issue of The Slant? This was the last article to be finished. Alas, I have not practiced my preaching.  These past few issues I have really struggled with what is supposed to go in this space. If I were to be like several of my predecessors, I would write about a random facet of my own life. If I were the editor of another Vanderbilt publication I would write about the content of my paper, turning my column into a redundancy.  Unfortunately, as I am too sarcastic to reflect on my inner feelings and too exact to create a redundancy, I am left in a conundrum.

While writing these columns there is one particular phrase that repeats again and again in my mind: “This would be a lot easier if I didn’t have to be funny.” Think if I could just write without worrying about the entertainment value? It’d be like the history paper I have to turn in tomorrow by noon!  Or perhaps, I could tell you all about fashion news, music reviews, and give you a list of the tracks I listened to while creating this. Or perhaps I could tell you the news of the day, write a shoddy opinion on why abortion should remain legal, or create a really pretty spread about sports that few people on campus would actually care about. However, I’m better than them, so I won’t.

Alas, like a monkey on a string, I am forced to perform. Except I chose this job, I have considerably less fur than a monkey, and there’s nothing actually physically holding me here. Wait… there’s nothing holding me here? There’s nothing holding me here!!!! …………

Related posts:

1. Point: Don’t Trust Andrew Ligon! Andrew Ligon is a bigot and a liar and...